I took a month off to just focus on everything else going on in my life. After a lot of serious thought I have decided to start working on Falling my way! I'm going to strip out all of the crap that was added to appease someone else and get back to the story I started with. I would rather that longer and rework my book that just publish a book that I can't be proud of. Right now that's how I feel and I never want to feel that way again about my "art".
I wrote Falling for me to share with others. Somewhere along the lines it has developed into a book written by me for others to judge. That's not what I want at all. I know not everyone will love my book and some might flat out hate my story. But guess what, there will be people out there that love my book and beg for more to be released. Those people are the ones I want to share my hobby with. My writing is to make me happy and allows me to share my happiness with others.
As of right now my book is crap and I'll be the first one to say it. It's changed so much that I don't even know how it got so lost so fast. I could edit the typos and publish Falling but I wouldn't be proud of it. The people I want to share my book with will be disappointed and the ones who judge it will be 100% right. I can't defend a book that I don't believe in so how can I put my name on it and call it mine? I'd rather it never see the light of day then be released as it is right now.
There is a huge difference in absorbing another point of view and conforming to it. Falling has been twisted and turned and stretched so much that it's no longer my book. It's a book that someone else thought I should write instead of guiding my vision to a better place. I want my book to be the best so I know things need to be tweaked but not changed. I don't know any other way to describe how I feel and how it will turn out.
But I promise that I will fix Falling and it will be 100% my vision where I can say I am proud to put my name on it. It might take me more time but in the end I know it will be worth it. I would like to thank everyone who has been supporting me thus far and I hope you stick around for the finished product. I love opening up my heart and soul for others to experience just by living through my story and my characters. It's a unique feeling knowing that my book might brighten someone's day or make them laugh when everything else has made them cry or frustrate them so much that they can't stop reading to find out what happens next. I promise you that I will deliver you a book that gives you all of that and more!